I used to call myself a work horse! I was a beast and believed my body was gonna work forever and I was going to be able to do massage long into my retirement age. I played hard and had plenty of injuries throughout my glorious life...from gymnastics to flag football thru age 45...and my military stint in between. I've had several diagnoses that when I say them out loud, its hard for some to believe...COPD, Myasthenia Gravis, and Cervical Spinal Stenosis to name a few. Then what I blamed on age, bad habits and work load, I felt disdain, frustration, and fear towards my body, always uncertain and afraid as to what might happen next. I've had to quit massage to be able to relieve pain and seizure like cramping in my hands, for arms, ribs and side.
I didn’t see it then, but my beliefs about my body were creating my reality about my body.
Over the past few months I have done a ton of work around changing my mindset and beliefs about my body, and I no longer think that my body is delicate. I believe that my body is strong, wise, and gives me guidance and direction that is never wrong.
The path to this point has been circuitous.
Deep compassion for myself and my body was the missing link in this process, and it required a softening in my attitude and thoughts.
Finding compassion for yourself requires that you allow for gentleness, grace, and gratitude.
I now understand the root of the burnout I experienced for so many years was in my compulsive need to prove myself for love and acceptance and I was in a constant state of self-judgment and self-criticism. Never satisfied, always needing more. Pushing and pushing.
I was my own worst enemy.
Of course, this was the exact opposite of the gentle allowance required for self-compassion, self-love, and healing. I see it all so clearly now.
I have found still more areas where I needed to allow and receive compassion in my relationship to myself and my body and I'm sharing them here, and in my blog Kelly's Korner.
The healing that I've experienced just in putting it together has been off the charts.
Healing the broken relationship with yourself and your body includes: healing the relationship you have with your mind, your diagnosis, your illness, the aging process, and your injuries.
When you can bring compassion into these spaces, it cracks your heart wide open and allows you to see things from a completely different perspective. You can see that you're not actually enemies with your body, brain or illness, but rather that you're on the same team.
You don't cheer on your teammates by berating them, judging, or criticizing them. You love on them like crazy.
That's what self-compassion opens up for you. Love, gratitude, and unity of mind, body, spirit.
I cannot wait to share this healing with you!
Reply below if you'd like an invite to my blog.
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